1. I need shower sex advice.


  2. I just want really frisky, dirty sex. Is that too much to ask for?


  3. All hot and bothered and the boy won’t help.


  4. There goes my summer.

  5. Thank you, internet. You always know my needs.


  6. Can we just fuck again?


  7. Nap/eating/facebook-creeping/watching tv »»> studying


  8. Bring on the boooooooze.

  9. Fuck yeah grad dress!

  10. Fuck yeah for doing yoga?

    We’ll have to wait and see tomorrow.


  11. Today, I donated blood for the first time.

    However, I couldn’t fill the entire unit. Why? My blood clotted faster than most peoples.

    Fuck yeah, my blood likes me.


  12. Fuck Valentine’s Day.

  13. I’ve wanted to watch Aladdin for like 6 months and could never find it in my house.

    Today, I found it. But the tape was ripped out of it.

    Fuck you, VHS.

  14. So this morning I get ready to go to school.

    Get there and have a sub.

    Do absolutely nothing for an hour but talk to people.

    Go to my next class.

    Can’t do work because the library is closed.

    Come home.

    Total time at school today: 1 hour and 20 minutes.

  15. I just did a career aptitude test, seeing as I don’t really have an idea of what to do with my life. After all the stupid questions, like are you okay with working with kids? Can you do math? Are you an organized person? I come back with 40 stupid motherfucking answers. RELIGIOUS COUNSELLOR?!?1?! PROBATION OFFICER?! I’M NOT QUALIFIED FOR THESE THINGS. Fuck you. I’d rather have the answers from the joke ones you take in grade 7. At least then I got clown, that’d be fun! Fuck you career website, and fuck you’re stupid fucking suggestions. Whoever made it can shove it up their ass. Kthx.

    PS. Have you seen the episode of Friends when Chandler goes and takes these tests? I feel his pain.